films seen
3
average score
2.33*
nationality
status
Alive and kicking
more info

Solid pieces

The VVitch: A New-England Folktale

The Witch
2015 / 92m - UK
Horror, Mystery
3.5*/5.0*
The VVitch: A New-England Folktale poster

Dubious filler

The Lighthouse

2019 / 109m - USA
Mystery
2.0*/5.0*
The Lighthouse poster

Eggers' choice to make this look like a classic arthouse film will no doubt please many, but I didn't appreciate the 4:3 and somewhat muddy black and white cinematography. Dafoe is great, Pattinson is not, neither is the tepid story that develops. The first half, which was actually quite light in tone, is by far the best part of the film. Not ideal for a mystery/thriller.

Plain forgettable

The Northman

2022 / 136m - USA
Adventure, Fantasy
1.5*/5.0*
The Northman poster

The Northman, a film from a director who clearly put a bit too much belief in all the praise he's been getting. The result is utterly ridiculous and kitsch, and the more serious and dramatic Eggers tried to be, the sillier and funnier his film became. It's only an inch away from parody, which would've been a much bolder and more original take to explore.

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The son of a king escapes after his father has been killed by his bastard brother. He scours the land, until he learns the whereabouts of his father's killer. He disguises himself as a slave and travels to Iceland, with just one goal in mind. Avenge his father and save his mother from the hands of he who destroyed his family.

The bombastic soundtrack, the horrible accents, the bland revenge plot, the over-the-top performances, the kitschy folklore. Everything is pumped to the max, but nothing impresses and the harder Eggers commits, the dizzier I got from all the eye-rolling. Points for daring to make something different, but this was just plain bad.