Log: week 31 / 2023

Aliens are planning to take over planet Earth, and they've come up with a slick plan to do so. Rather than come with an army of their own, they invade the cemeteries and start to bring the dead back to life. With their army of undead humans, they plan to overrun the cities and conquer Earth.

These old B-movies are often extremely dialogue-driven (and terribly boring as a result), as a way to disguise their lack of budget. Wood Jr. doesn't cut back on effect shots (or silliness), instead, he makes do with what he's got. Yes, it's a complete cheese fest, but the pacing is slick and there's enough wackiness to prevent boredom from creeping in. Much better than many give it credit for.

Humbert is an author who rents a room in Charlotte Haze's home. He does so because he has a thing for her daughter, who is barely 14 years old. Charlotte has her eye set on Humbert, which further complicates things, and there's another man who has taken an interest in Charlotte's daughter.

The controversy is purely thematic (an older man with a young girl), the film itself is almost all dialogue. Mason and Lyon aren't the best actors though, so their romance never felt very real. The black-and-cinematography is also pretty dull and the runtime is a bit of a hassle, but the film does pick up the pace in the final 30 minutes.

When Takeshi wakes up, he finds that he is turning into a monster while wearing a suit that gives him superpowers. It turns out a scientist made him this way, in an attempt to stop similar creatures that are being brought to life with more nefarious intentions. Takeshi accepts his destiny, but his fight will not be easy.

I didn't know much about Kamen Rider, but the lore is quite a bit crazier than most other tokusatsu franchises I know. Anno doesn't hold back either and leans into the action and weirdness of it all. It's still a bit too cheesy for my liking, but I definitely appreciated the dedication and the random twists and turns this film took.

It's a shame because the presentation is rather neat. The slow-paced cinematography and the moody score make for an atmospheric documentary. It's the interviews and the poorly connected subject matter that detracts from the experience. The interview with astronomer Gaspar Galaz, in particular, irked me.

An abundance of new age quotes sit badly with the gruesome history of Chile that many are trying to forget. The only tangible link between these themes is the Atacama Desert, but putting everything in a single documentary makes little sense. A failed experiment, but not without its moments.

Haruka is going through a rough period. She is fired from her job for being too straightforward, and soon after her mother dies, leaving the family business without an immediate successor. Haruka wants to close down the shop and sell the house, but her siblings don't want to bury their parents' legacy right away.

Haruka is an interesting character and I would've preferred for the film to focus on her story. Instead, three extra characters are added, each with their own troubles. The cinematography is nice, so is the score and the performances are very good. It's a more than solid film, but there are so many of these and Sakon didn't do enough to set it apart.

Three college girls found a map that shows them a way to a hidden marijuana field. On their way there, they get a lift from a suicidal guy who immediately falls in love with one of the girls. The map leads them nowhere until they see some suspicious bikers who they decide to follow.

The plot is utter nonsense. It's all about the characters, the dialogue, and the silly situations. The setting is pleasant, the tone is light throughout and the short runtime is a blessing. Ishii would improve in his later films, refining his trademark elements, but this was a very good start to his career.

Sakuko accidentally falls into the sea, Saibara witnesses the scene and turns it into a painting. Saibara is a gifted artist and people love her painting. She wants Sakuko to model for her next work, but Sakuko, an aspiring artist herself, is annoyed by the attention Saibara gets. The two are more alike than she suspects though.

A pleasant seaside setting, a small town, and some high school drama. Add two girls who are battling their own demons and find strength in each other's company, and you have a bunch of familiar themes and tropes. Sakuko's art project (a funky self-made boat) is the real star piece of the film, the rest is sweet and wholesome, but not quite unique enough to become a true gem. Prime filler though.

The film is a fictional account of the last days of Kurt Cobain. We follow a man who struggles with life, who wanders around aimlessly, and feels disconnected from the world around him. Friends and professional relations come to visit him, but they all seem to need something from him.

There are some very poignant scenes, but I didn't care for the ones that were music-led. The problem with this type of minimalism is that when it doesn't grab you, you're just looking at rather dull scenes that drone on endlessly, and there are a few too many of those moments. Not bad, but Van Sant did it better.

Broly is revived once more, but this time he's cloned by an evil scientist, who wants to use Bio-Broly and a few other Bio-warriors to uncover Satan's scam. A selection of the Dragon Ball crew is tasked with stopping the scientist and his bioengineered friends, which turns out to be quite the challenge.

The animation is slightly better, the plot doesn't stop dead in its tracks halfway through and the fight sequences are a bit more exciting. I still don't see the greatness of this franchise, but I do think it's at its best when it leans into the crazy and the weird, rather than the action. Decent.

Scientists accompanied by a journalist are diving in a small submarine to unexplored places. An underground volcano goes off and the submarine is hurled off course. The men are saved by another sub, led by a captain who claims he is part of an underwater paradise. While he shows them his world, they are attacked by the captain's arch-nemesis.

There's a bit of everything here, from lost/hidden worlds to laser fights and mutant animals. It makes little sense, but it allows Honda to play around like the giant kidult he is. It also makes sure there are few dull moments. It's not the most glorious or fancy cinema, but there's an undeniable charm that makes these films quite easy to watch.

Three brothers are in a synth band, their manager tries to get them gigs but nobody in Japan seems to be into their style of music. She won't back down and keeps pushing for work, the brothers don't utter a word and simply follow her wherever she goes. With each attempt, the manager becomes more desperate.

The music is horrendous, the indie look isn't effective in hiding the lack of budget, and while some of the jokes are nice, too many of them are predictable and lazy. Japan is really bad at music-based films, even the indie ones can't save face. Maybe if they'd tried it with some actual techno ...

Asta is a young boy who was born without magic powers. He is the only one in his world, still, he is determined to make it as a magic knight. When former Wizard Kings reappear to turn the country into disarray, Asta and his friends will need all their strength and wits to keep them at bay.

The character designs don't match the backgrounds, the animation is awkward and the dub feels flat and lifeless. The film is also way too long and some of the lore is tedious, but I will say that things pick up in the second half, when the film works toward a truly epic finale. It's not enough to save the whole thing though. This is just TV anime posing as a feature film.

An architect drives out to the countryside to work on a home. Once there, he recognizes the place and the people present as part of a recurring dream he has had. He tells them about his dream, but not everyone is willing to believe him. The others have some mysterious stories of their own to share though.

Dialogue-driven, like so many other films of its time. It's the opposite of what I look for in a film, so it's no surprise this didn't really do it for me. The performances weren't great either, and the stories were pretty underwhelming. The anthology-like setup did mean there was enough happening to keep me occupied at least.

Yang Jian is born with a third eye. The villagers don't take kindly to him and tease him with his mutation until Jian has had enough and summons a dragon. His mother dies protecting him from the creature, the only way for Jian to continue is to accept his fate and remove the seal that protects his third eye.

And so another fantasy adventure starts. The film offers a mix of fantasy, action, and comedy (with comedy being the most questionable part of the film). The CG is passable, the action is amusing, and the fantastical elements are lush. Solid streamer fun in other words, exactly what I expected from it.

Elmer is a young boy who moves to the city with his mom to set up shop there. They are hit with adversities and Elmer has a falling out with his mother. He runs away from home and gets tangled up in a mission to save a dragon from captivity. The dragon is forced to carry an island that is close to sinking, Elmer's task is to free the dragon.

The music is nice, the adventure is exciting and there are some lovely moments between Elmer and the dragon, but the whole feels a tad childish and visually underdeveloped. It would be nice to see Twomey and cohorts make a film for a slightly more mature audience, I'm certain it could be amazing.

A young boy befriends a black stallion on a ship, but then disaster strikes. A storm hits the ship and the two are thrown overboard. The horse rescues the boy from drowning and the both of them get stranded on a deserted island. They grow closer together, but staying together will be difficult once they return to society.

Most of the first half is silent, which was a great relief. The cinematography is nice and the bond between the boy and the animal is properly developed. Once they return to society the quality takes a big dip, but there are still a few moments that stand out. It's a shame the film is so sharply divided into two parts, especially with the best part coming first. Still, this could've been a lot worse.

Hwang Woo-suk's ethics are at the center of the film, but the makers don't really do much with it. We get a voice-over that is eager to sensationalize his fall from grace, and we get two tangentially related stories (one about camels, the other about a cloned dog), but there's little cohesion, and many topics are never explored in depth.

Still, it's nice to see Woo-suk given a proper, openhearted interview, not looking to blame others or ignoring his own responsibility in the matter. His take on science is just a little different from the Western one. Making a good doc is not easy, but I feel the quality baseline should be higher than it was here.

Maddie is short on cash, so when she sees an ad looking for a person to date the awkward son of a rich couple, she feels like she might be the ideal candidate for the job. She is to teach him about sex, alcohol, and partying, but as they spend more time together, she starts to develop a liking for him.

The plot is pretty basic, the jokes are rather predictable and there's little cinematic appeal here. It's just a very average romcom, with Lawrence being the main attraction of the film. That's not quite enough to make it stand out, but it's not the worst 100 minutes you can spend with a film either.